This is a joke and mostly for Kiersten who is a self-proclaimed, "math geek." Because I am not a, "self-proclaimed math geek," even the problem itself won't be set up correctly so I'll let Kiersten do that for me.

This morning I found a, presumbably deceased chipmunk -I didn't hold a mirror up to its mouth to check for respiration- on my porch. My very old cat, "Mike," was sitting next to it. Since he's so old and has few teeth and no front claws, it's likely that his younger companion cat, "Alice," did the deed.

*for none cat-people, cats bring "offerings," of animals to their owners with regularity as a show of respect or something like that according to animal behavior books.*

Nicole has said that she lives on farm with what seems like, "about a hundred cats."

If I, having two cats, find chipmunks, birds and various other small animals on my porch on the avergage of say, twice a month, how many chipmunks, birds and other small animals does Nicole find on hers?

We'll let Kiersten figure out the other specifics like the possibility of small-animal wildlife per the amount of square footage, land, etc.

Have fun!

i'm gonna guess fifty "animal offerings" will be brought to her porch. but i'm just guessing. what's your guess kiersten??

Wait a second. If it's a "guess," then it's not really a math problem, right? That's more like a guess-the-weight-win-the-pig type of thing. Oh wait. That was a movie, Babe.

I had a seminary professor who was always looking for the Gospel story in movies. He thought Babe was one such movie, the little pig, despised, rejected, misunderstood, almost sacrificed, who saves the day...

Kiersten, you're my hero. I think it was the inclusion of the letter, "x" that really impressed me. Of course I must admit that because I am so challenged in this area, being impressed by the letter "x" in a math problem might be like being impressed when a guy says he knows how to play the guitar and proceeds to play the intro to Stairway to Heaven...

Maybe, we should throw some physics into it, like determining the velocity of these "offerings" as they fall from the cats mouth to Nicole's porch...

some people aren't this smart and have to stick to humor lol!!

i have no problem admiting my inability to do math. my test scores prove it without me even having to say anything lol!! i'm glad somebody can do it though. i know who to call if i need help with homework.!!!

Don't feel insecure, Meg. I remain thankful that there was no math required for an M.Div. and the only reason I was able to finish undergraduate school was because of two words:

MATH TUTOR

My husband tried helping me but being pretty much, polar opposites, we had, "communication issues." All our homework sessions ended with me in tears.

Him: Honey, I'm just trying to help you understand this process so you know why you're doing it.

Me: I don't want to understand it. I just want to know how to work the blankety-blank problem so that I can pass the blankety-blank class!!! (jumps up from kitchen table and runs out of the room, bathroom door slams, hysterical snot-crying is heard, someone sleeps on sofa.)

Good times, eh? We had just gotten married when I took that class.

The only thing I remember from college algebra is how to factor a trinomial. That's it. And it's been awhile since I've seen a trinomial so I wouldn't want to bet my life on it...

You know Kiersten, you have a point. And I'm very much a, "why," person in almost every other respect. I think in my case I'd reached that desperate/frustrated level of the pressure being on to perform the tasks at hand and having already gone through the, "why," explanation offered by professors and various other math lovers (which didn't make any sense to me, and this includes an explanation from one of my best friends who teaches it at the college level,) even they concluded, "Stop asking, 'why' and just do the problem or you won't graduate!"

And the only way I could do the problem was to memorize the steps.

But since we're on the subject of, "why" and you are a self-proclaimed lover of math and all things mathematical -which (mathematics) was, I know, created by the Lord as indicated by a variety of math gems hidden in places like flower petals- why moles?

Chemistry moles, I mean.

If we can, I assume, define and measure atoms and molecules, then why was it necessary to create an artificial form of measurement such as moles?

I made a C in chemistry, as you might expect.

And no, I don't believe (but I should check facts here) that "tempatious" is a real word, but is sounds cool so I declare my support here and now for Kiersten and her inventive vocabulary!

If I ever edit a dictionary, I promise to insert the word, "tempatious" and put Kiersten's picture next to it.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Lucie Manette,

ok first of all i've never taken chemistry so ya'll talking about moles is like me trying to understand greek but it's fun trying to figure it out lol!! lucie, i'm not insecure i was just messin with kiersten and i too am a y person. ask my mother. i question everything!!

i love u too!! lol!! u know me to well!!

HAHA Kiersten's a Math Geek! j/k its my fav. subject! LOL

alright i'll give u my math homework and ya'll can give me your english papers lol!!

WOOT WOOT sounds like a plan!!!!